".......encourage the young women to love their husbands, to love their children,
to be sensible, pure, workers at home, kind, being subject to their own husbands, so that the word of God will not be dishonored."
I'll be doing what my "own" husband wants me to do.. focus on being a housewife and mommy. No, I won't be "working" (meaning getting a job)! My heart is at home. My gifts are with the home. The whole point is to lighten the load to make me a BETTER mommy and a BETTER housewife. I think working would just keep me overloaded and not functioning well. That's just me.
Many mom's are very gifted with kids. Gifted to teach them their lessons, to be creative when they don't understand. They have a real passion for schooling. I've discovered once I let go to God's leading, that that is not my main gift. If God still wanted me, and my husband still wanted me to try it anyway... I would, but it is a minefield of frustrations for me. Housekeeping is a sheer delight for me when I can do it (when homeschooling, there has really been no time for it beyond survival mode). In the past year I have gotten so mundane in my meals and organization of that, I look forward to putting on my apron more! That is another area I delight in.
Please don't misunderstand, I delight in my children, but not easily in the area of academics. I start to get to works oriented in that area that I pressure them more than help them. I feel pressure myself too which makes me struggle just to love them. I'm not saying this is a cure for that and the delighting comes purely through prayer and from the Lord because life itself with kids is a growing experience. However, taking off some of my load so I can focus on delighting and cheering is the idea and what Rick really sees I will shine at.
If I could trade a moment of seeing my kid multiply a four digit number for the first time, for a moment of discussion about life issues and turning our hearts to God, I'll trade it. I delight in discussing life, I delight in caring for my family's needs (food, clothes, making a warm haven, etc) more than I delight in their schooling. I delight in sitting with them and talking about God, and how huge he is, and how much he loves them and wants to be involved in every area of their lives. I love talking about how he is conforming us all to his image through trails, how he wants us to find our joy in him as we were created to do.
I have not been able to pursue these gifts with homeschooling.
My husband knows I delight in these areas of life and he is encouraging me now to make them my focus. I think, the more we see how mommy has been off track, the more we look forward to the joyful journey God is putting us on.
I will also be up at the school a lot, in the classrooms a lot. I plan to make that a priority. It has been advised to us that this is an important thing for a mom to do so she can really know not just the teachers, but the kids as well. Hearing what is going on and knowing who everyone is.
I will be praying more during the day. I will be taking time to bring my children before the Lord while they are gone. Rick would like me to pray about the times we take in the evening with the kids and take notes on what to discuss. Pay attention to what is coming home in conversation, pray over it, and formulate biblical discussion ready to go when we sit and share with the kids.
Our plan is to take a little time each evening to "meet" with each kid, and then on other nights just spend that family time we would have anyway. Princess would have one on one more times in the week than the other two since we are sure she will need more discipling. It will be my role while Rick is working and the kids are at school, to pray over these times, and record what in general is going on or asked. These are the channels I was seeking of that we need to open, but not in a overbearing way, we want them to be natural and comfortable, yet God focused.
The main goal will be for me to be diligent with the time in the day, so that any time away from school is relationship/fellowship time. Some chores, yes, but mainly time as a family. Times of delighting and supporting them. These hours will be guarded and honored highly. There will be no cleaning (beyond dinner clean up), no projects (unless they involve the kids), no organizing (menus, schedules, coupons etc), no laundry, no errands or shopping. This will be sacred time. Time to hear where they are, support them.
When they are down .... there will be sacred time for Rick and I. For in the midst of all this, God has been showing me something else I've been slipping at....loving my husband. When we homeschool it is so easy to put the kids above our relationship (for us, again, many couples are good at this balance). Even in the evening there is prep needed for the next day's schooling, maybe even studying of the material etc. So, another surprise God had for me was to show me I was putting things out of order.
More on that later...