The New Year's Commit-It List

btw-my keyboard seems to not want to type the letter "i" unless I work hard at it. So, if you catch it missing, you will know why. It's bugging me to fix it each time.

As I mentioned before, I wanted to do goals different this year. I wanted to commit to the Lord some things he has laid on my heart to shoot for.

1. Lord, I commit to you a desire to know your word better. Both in context and content. I long to really feast on truth this year.

2. Lord, I feel a great burden to grow as a wife. I have been married for nearly 12 years and have been so distracted with a decade of babies and toddler years. I love the new season of life I'm in now and want to put Rick first and get to know him better this year. I commit this desire to you and ask you to give me focus and practical wisdom how to do this. I also ask that you would grow my heart toward him and let the things that distract me fall away.

3. Lord, I commit to you a desire to disciple my children through this next year. Practically in the ways that they are developing their godly world views. I long to be deliberate in planing some of the ways to do this and more so being open to seizing the moments as they come. This desire is related to #1 because I am sure that knowing your word more will fuel my ability to lead them in your truth.

4. Lord, I have a joyful mission to make this home a haven this year. Not by spending money but using the resources you give me creatively. I desire to be diligent in the hours you give me and not waste them but use them to clear the board for family moments when everyone is home. I commit this desire to you and ask that you give me the strength to persevere.

5. Lord, I commit my health to you. To do my part to make wise decisions in that regard but to also not become consumed with wrong motivations and the idol that health can be in our culture. Help me remember that anything I do to be more healthy is for one purpose alone: to glorify you by being better equip to bless those you need me to serve, and to maintain a balanced cheerful mood that is so effected by the every day health decisions I make.

6. Lord, I commit to you my desire to stop reading into other's motives and thoughts. I see this as a hindering sin in my life. Help me do what it says in Colosians and mind my own business. Help me be a friend when I need to be and leave the rest to you of what people may or may not think of me. I desire to be absolutely obsessed with your perceptions of me alone. Thank you that you are faithful to me in this regard.

7. Lord I commit to you a desire to become more resourceful and a good steward of that which you have given. To work well with money in our budget, and learn to make or grow what I can. May I not try to take on more than you would have for me but find balance in what to do or not do.

8. Lord I commit to you a desire to continue to share the gospel with the many unbelievers there now are in my everyday life. Allow me to just speak what you would have me, to just be bold, and above all, to love people you are seeking to save.

Thank you for the prospect of a year to grow in you, but help me not to hold onto even that more than I do to you. Thank you that your work on the cross shadows over all I hope to do this year. Let me remember "it is finished" and let it thunder threw my soul again and again with it's complete perfection and promise eternal.

My Random Brain Sparks

Had a lot of thoughts yesterday. Can't remember them all. I was out and about and they would just come to me.

The ATM machines are killing me. Every time you figure them out they change. Every store has a different one with a different routine and because they update them, the rotation of changing machines seems to be frequent enough to create a new learning experience every time I shop. I felt like a bad stand up comedian yesterday when commenting to the cashier about the new question at the Target one: "Do you want that all on your card?". My first thought? "Um, no, you can pay for part of it!" Then I was annoyed by the new question issue itself. What else will the machine want to know soon? "Are you wearing blue today?" "Did you enjoy the last movie you watched?" "Are you happy?" "Did you spend too much money today?" ...... my brain obnoxiously just kept going.........................

Christmas Clearance has become a spiritual experience. I remember a few years ago I was fresh off the trail from reading the "Left Behind" books. I found myself halting from buying any Christmas clearance because I was absolutely sure Christ had to be returning soon. I think that was the year my dad was really sick and I knew he was going to pass away soon so it seemed that the whole world would surely end as well.
Then, last year, I survived that tragedy and my spirits were up more. I decided to buy some presents on clearance and in a way it was a good idea. The only problem s that you take a big risk as to whether the gifts will be wanted by the time whatever child you are buying for will still have that interest. Plus, I got tired of storing things in my closet all year (we don't have a garage).
So, this year I went with the intent of not getting anything that was not a steal. As I looked around and absorbed the hum of humanity taking in as much as they could for the next time they all celebrated I felt strange. I wanted to say really loud "How do you even know if you will be here by next year?" "How do you know the next Christmas is promised you?" "So much can happen in a year!" "How can you hoard for today what is not promised you for tomorrow?!" It reminded me of the verse about the man who stored up all his barns full and felt satisfied and prepared and then the scripture says "you fool, don't you know this night you life is required of you?" It's a little depressing on the surface, and I don't mean it that way but it sure helped me not to overspend. I grabbed a few puzzles and doodle pads for 75 cents each to keep for when the kids are invited to birthday parties. I also could not resist a Chip and Dale mommy sized pair of james for six bucks. I never get character jamies and I love Chip and Dale. It was so cute, my girls both came in my room and said "yeah! Chip and Dale jamies!" and I said "aren't those cute! They are for me!" and they got the cutest jealous, but I love you, fake frowny face. I think they have never seen me wear a character jamie before.:)

I'm Amazed At the power of Facebook. I just reconnected yesterday with my old team leaders and a few teammates from my Honduras Teen Missions trip back in 1991! (Thanks Tony for coming by the blog and commenting!) The more I'm on Facebook, the more amazed I am that you can go back and follow the trail of so many other people as they have gone off and lived their own lives. It's rather foreshadowing of heaven when we reunite with the Saints and hear what God did in their lives. You also realize what a small world it is when you start to find the people you know connected or connected to random people you don't know but it shows that they know people you know. Does that make sense? It's been a thrill for my husband too since he was such a social bug at The Masters College. He has more friends than me but I'm okay with that!:)

I'm thinking commitment over resolve. I've been thinking about resolutions and I've come to the conclusion that I suck at them. I want more to commit some things to the Lord that I know I'm discontent in a good way about. Those things that the Holy Spirit stirs me to work toward a victory in through Him. So I've decided to make a "New Years Commit It" List. This also takes me to my knees as apposed to trying to stand tall to "think I can" when sin cuts me at the back of the knees with a bat every time. Makes me think of these words:
"Not by might,

Not by power,

But by MY SPIRIT...says the Lord."

Zechariah 4:6