An Intimate Search For Goals From Prov. 31

If you are like me, you may sometimes dread reading that passage. Especially when I was very young and had toddlers and babies around me I would just beat myself up that I did not achieve high enough. In fact, there should be a just for fun version of Prov. 31 for the new mom. That would be entertaining and the theme would be "grace in the midst of continuous survival mode".
Yet I found myself this week anxious to get to Prov. 31 even though it was not up on the calendar Proverb of the day yet. I wanted to take an intimate look at it and filter out what were some real sensible practical goals, not for perfection sake, but for the blessing it would bring for my life and that of my husband and family.
Through the years I think we all as Christian mom's define in our minds what a Godly woman looks like. Twice in my married life I have gone all out in skirts and dresses thinking that this made me a more Godly woman. The funny thing to me was that both times, and especially the last time about two years ago, my husband said he wished I would wear pants! I was in such a state of pride at the time that, though I did not tell him this, I responded in my heart that he was just not spiritual enough and did not appreciate true femininity. Oh, the Lord convicted me on that one, and I put my pants back on. (of course I wear dresses too but he does not like me wearing them every day and for those reasons). Later on, I found it quite cute that he liked me in pants and enjoyed the freedom of that. I tend to be an all or nothing person so I have to be very careful of legalistic patterns creeping up in my life. The homeschooling thing started to become this in me too and as some of you know from reading here for a while...God worked on me in that one too. Oh, I'm so relieved he does not let me go my own way! I'm so thankful he does not let me find salvation in ANYTHING else but Him.
Oh, yes, so....
I am only going to touch on the first three points today because I don't want to wear anyone out. I will come back and complete this walk though as the week goes on I hope (I'm battling a bad cold right now so who knows but I may be nursing sick kids soon).
One my notebook, I wrote at the top :
Practicality of Proverbs 31
(kind of a "how does this apply to me?" or "what would this look like for me?")

One huge thing to note first whenever approaching Proverbs 31 is to remember that it is in fact a poem of sorts written in the Hebrew to the 22 letters of the Hebrew alphabet. So, it would be like you taking the ABC's and coming up with a set of goals for what a woman aught to be. Or you could call it a prayer. It is infact however an ideal scenario and should be taken as a target to shoot for in the grace and power of Christ and not my willpower or pride.
It is also set in (as John MacArthur in his study guides points out) a "wealthy home and the customs of the ancient Near East" but the ideas still apply to all.

Vs. 11-12: "The heart of her husband trusts in her,

and he will have no lack of gain.

She does him good and not evil all the days of her life. "

= He can trust me to use our resources wisely and responsibly. I show him my loyalty through doing this. My decisions on these resources add to our family rather than take from them.

This one is very convicting to me for when I make spontaneous decisions with money when I 'm out and about. I recently told Rick that the girls were both going to need new tennis shoes and asked if we could set some money aside for them in the next paycheck. I did not really think about it except that I knew if I did not say anything, at the place where we are now, there would be no money. The amazing thing though, and the thing the Lord brought to me later, was that he thanked me for letting him know ahead of time and told me that it was very helpful for me to do that for him. Huh.. so simple.

The other aspect of this, and I think this one is all I'm going to get to today because of the time, is that my resources are not only the money he gives me to use. They are also the time in my day, the decisions I make with it, the care of the stuff we all ready have (i.e. clothes, food, furniture etc.), and guarding as well as maintaining my own energy level. That alone goes into many other categories of decision making like what I choose to eat, whether I use all that we have or waste it, whether I get enough sleep to have energy, how much time I spend on the computer etc.

And on that awesome send off note, that's it for today. More hopefully tomorrow.

(PS: Please feel free to comment, the blog has been so quiet lately. I hope my mixing things up so much has not left ya all silent. I do love to know that you're here and any feed back you have on the writings, thanks!)

How To Stay Married

I read these in the latest Readers Digest and thought they were great:

The secret to marriage is the same as the secret to living in California...

When you find a fault , don't DWELL on it!

Marriage is all about falling in love over and over and over again......

with the same person.

(no quotes because I'm paraphraising and too tired to look up who said it)

I thought those were great and the last one thrills me. It's so true.

I've recently fallen in love again myself.

"Come On Baby, Let's Get Away"

I love exercising to that Janet Song on my Project Playlist , and I truly had a great Escapade weekend!

Today marks 12 years since my sweet fella and I said it would be "forever", and I'm so much more in love with him today than any year or moment before hand. Time makes love better like a good wine. Many people miss out on that because they tire of it before it mellows and sweetens. God knew what he was doing when he said "stick it out, people!".

We headed out on Friday and dropped the kids off with my mom. I was nervous how they would be for her. Even when Dad was alive, they did not take them EVER for two nights. In fact, this was our first two nights away in 12 years. They did great, and I'm relieved.

We stayed in Cambria which is our favorite get away. It was a lovely suite at Cambria Pines Lodge with two fire places and a jacuzzi tub...yeee haw! The GREAT deal he got included dinner with a bottle of wine (Yes, I ordered Fillet Mignon and he a New York steak, baby!) and two hot all-you-can-eat breakfasts. Such a deal and lovely place.

We headed out Saturday for a tour of Hearst Castle since we kind of started that tradition on our 10 year anniversary. We did tour #2 which he had never done and I did when I was about 11 (The main library)

years old. It is the one you get to see his room , the libraries, Julia Morgan's room, and my favorite (drum roll please!) ...the KITCHEN! OH, Yeah! That is my dream kitchen and YES, I (does that counter not scream for you to make SOMETHING!!!!)

DO remember seeing it when I was little. I have loved kitchens subconsciously I think. Oh, my goodness, the vintage beauty of an old kitchen! Old machines, huge stainless steel counter top (ovens and rotissary with the mixer and meat grinder in the background for all that fresh beef right off the ranch hills)

that was about 20 feet by 5 feet in size (are you not drooling by now?). The old wooden cabinet looking iceboxes with old metal seal hinges....oh, my. All the food was for (this is just the pantry..can you imagine the culinary potential?!!!)

the most part, grown on the ranch at Hearst, so we are talking fresh herbs, fresh fruit

and veggies and Jersey cows giving milk to make cheese and butter. Can food making get any better than that? I ask you.

Rick liked his smaller library with it's Greek collection of goblets and vases. It was cozy and inviting. The main library was much more formal but beautiful and well lit with natural light.

Julia Morgan's room was built to her scale (she was very short and designed the room herself) and if you have ever seen it, it's very unique with a tiny staircase winding up to her loft bed area.

Of course it was a gorgeous California day, and the view was spectacular.

We went from there down into the heart of Cambria and walked through some antique stores. Now, most men don't enjoy this venture, but not my man. He loves it. It helps to marry a man who loves history and it's collectibles. I look at the Pyrex, he looks at the coins, books and comics. We had a blast. I found an old Crazy Daisy Juice Carafe that is very hard to find, and he found a comic book and an old Bambi record he says is an exact replica of one he had as a child. It includes a lovely large story book.

From here, we traveled down to Trader Joe's and picked out our lunch/dinner picnic needs/wants. Wine, dill Havarti, German cheese, salami and other Italian meats, a bit of smoked salmon, grapes, bread, and some veggies and a Greek Yogurt w/ cilantro and chives dip. Ahhh.. We headed up to a wonderful new sand dune at Montana De Oro that we picnicked just days before with the kids. From it, you can see all of the coast including all of the Morro Bay area. It was my favorite time of all. We watched the sun go down and the dolphins come in to shore to feed. Breathtaking and unforgettable. We sat up so high that we were warm and windless pretty much until the sun went down and the temps dropped so quickly. I wanted to stay and star gaze, but Rick had a good point that we would be hiking back in the dark since we did not have a flashlight. It was quite a hike back to the car too. So, we stayed until Canis Majoris came out and Betelgeuse in the upper right shoulder of Orion followed by the final star in this perfect triangle which I can't recall the name of.

The next day we took our time and had breakfast and one more run through the antique stores before heading back to get the kids. Rick gave me a beautiful gift of a turquoise necklace and ear rings for our anniversary. It is my birthstone but more than that, he loves me wearing it because of my Indian heritage and complexion. It was beautiful. He did a great job. As if I was not spoiled enough, he let me pick out a Turquoise ring at the antique store to go with it. I think he really likes it on me. I did find one, and love it.

It was one of the best weekends of my life and I wished it did not have to end. Still, we do love our children and it was good to bring them home.

Twelve years goes very fast and I feel as if the next will too. I love him more than ever and in a more deeply and fascinatingly complicated way. It is both fully accepting of that which bugs me, and that which I love and produces the most real and yet piercing passion for a man that will ever consume me.

Yes, I will let him read this. It's good he knows. :)

Poets may write, singers may croon,

Wise men may ponder beneath the moon-

Many may feel in similar way,

Or say better now, what I have to say.

But here is a beating that never will end,

A heart for my endless lover and friend.

From me, happy 12th!
Give me more where they came from.

Love you.